COWT; The Raven Cycle; In another world
Feb. 29th, 2020 06:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ephitomisTitle: In another world
Fandom: The Raven Cycle
Notes: Written for the prompt "Kaijuu" for COWT10.
Wordcount: 460
Summary: Ronan wonders what would have happened if he didn't live in a world where Kaijuus attacked.
Ronan wonders, sometimes, if maybe his life would have been easier if he wasn’t the son of the creator of the Jaeger technology.
He sometimes wonders if he could have been happier, if maybe his father could have been here with him, instead of lost inside his mind.
These are dangerous thoughts, he knows, but he can’t help but ask himself sometimes if maybe he could have been better, more stable. In a world without the Kaijus, in a world without the ever looming threat of death peaking at them from every corner. Maybe he would have someone who didn’t have to wake up screaming every night, who didn’t have to remind himself that the voice of his father inside his head was just a cruel, hollow whisper and nothing else.
His father was dead, lost to the war and the mouth of a level 3 Kaijuu, but not for Ronan who still felt his presence in every waking moment and even in all his dreams.
There was nothing to be done, they said, when someone was so brutally murdered while linked with you… there was nothing anyone could have done to prevent Niall from leaving a print in Ronan’s mind.
The worst thing, probably, was that they were forced to bench him indefinitely. Ronan couldn’t very well drift with someone when he dragged along the ghost of someone else, and so Dream (his and his father’s Jaeger) was being dismantled in order to be remade to fit someone else.
Ronan hated it.
He spent most of his waking hours watching the robot being dismantled, piece by piece, and he’ll watch while they’ll put it back together wrong.
The only moments he enjoys anymore, are the moments Adam Parrish takes a break from dismantling the only tangible thing Ronan still has of his father, to come and talk to him. Adam is funny, sarcastic, a fucking bastard, and Ronan think that in another world he might have tried to win Adam over.
Not that he’s not embarrassingly in love with Adam in this world, but just like he can’t begin to hope to find someone to drift with, he can’t very well date anyone while his father lives on in his head.
Adam… Ronan doesn’t know his story, but sometimes he has a haunted look in his eyes that scares him. Adam deserves better than Ronan.
Still, sometimes he wonders, when the other says something funny, or avoids a playful punch with Ronan without even looking at him… what if Ronan never drifted with his father. What if Ronan didn’t have a broken mind and a broken soul.
He thinks maybe…
But that was another world, another life. A better one but not the one Ronan or Adam were dealt.
Fandom: The Raven Cycle
Notes: Written for the prompt "Kaijuu" for COWT10.
Wordcount: 460
Summary: Ronan wonders what would have happened if he didn't live in a world where Kaijuus attacked.
Ronan wonders, sometimes, if maybe his life would have been easier if he wasn’t the son of the creator of the Jaeger technology.
He sometimes wonders if he could have been happier, if maybe his father could have been here with him, instead of lost inside his mind.
These are dangerous thoughts, he knows, but he can’t help but ask himself sometimes if maybe he could have been better, more stable. In a world without the Kaijus, in a world without the ever looming threat of death peaking at them from every corner. Maybe he would have someone who didn’t have to wake up screaming every night, who didn’t have to remind himself that the voice of his father inside his head was just a cruel, hollow whisper and nothing else.
His father was dead, lost to the war and the mouth of a level 3 Kaijuu, but not for Ronan who still felt his presence in every waking moment and even in all his dreams.
There was nothing to be done, they said, when someone was so brutally murdered while linked with you… there was nothing anyone could have done to prevent Niall from leaving a print in Ronan’s mind.
The worst thing, probably, was that they were forced to bench him indefinitely. Ronan couldn’t very well drift with someone when he dragged along the ghost of someone else, and so Dream (his and his father’s Jaeger) was being dismantled in order to be remade to fit someone else.
Ronan hated it.
He spent most of his waking hours watching the robot being dismantled, piece by piece, and he’ll watch while they’ll put it back together wrong.
The only moments he enjoys anymore, are the moments Adam Parrish takes a break from dismantling the only tangible thing Ronan still has of his father, to come and talk to him. Adam is funny, sarcastic, a fucking bastard, and Ronan think that in another world he might have tried to win Adam over.
Not that he’s not embarrassingly in love with Adam in this world, but just like he can’t begin to hope to find someone to drift with, he can’t very well date anyone while his father lives on in his head.
Adam… Ronan doesn’t know his story, but sometimes he has a haunted look in his eyes that scares him. Adam deserves better than Ronan.
Still, sometimes he wonders, when the other says something funny, or avoids a playful punch with Ronan without even looking at him… what if Ronan never drifted with his father. What if Ronan didn’t have a broken mind and a broken soul.
He thinks maybe…
But that was another world, another life. A better one but not the one Ronan or Adam were dealt.
